Divorce Solutions

Question #164

Hello. I was looking at your website, and I have a question to ask. I got married in March of 2004. My husband abandoned me in August of 2004. Our son was born in October of 2004. It has been almost five years now that he left. I know that he went to Mexico, but I have no idea where. He hasn’t contacted me since, and I do not have any way to get a hold of him, I have no clue where he could be. I am ready to move on with my life. I would like to get a divorce, but how do I start. We do not own any property together; we lived with my parents. I would like sole custody of my son. Would I even be able to get divorced on account that my husband is nowhere to be found? What about getting sole custody? He has not attempted to contact his son or me for that matter. I am ready to leave that behind. I am in California, I know you help people in New York, but if you could give me some idea at what I will be looking at, I would appreciate it. Thank You. 

Try contacting one of his relatives or friends who may know his whereabouts. It will be much quicker and less expensive if you can locate him and get his cooperation. If you still cannot find him, you can file for divorce in the county clerk’s office in the county you are living. You will have to prove to the court that you made every effort to locate your spouse but were unable to find him. You will probably have to publish an announcement in a local paper regarding your search for him.

If he has abandoned you and his child (assuming he is aware that he has a son), you can, at the same time, request sole custody of the child.

I strongly suggest that you contact the San Diego Bar association, ask for the Matrimonial department, and see if they have a pro-bono
Group that can assist you. If that is unsuccessful, contact the county clerk’s office, matrimonial part, and ask for assistance. It is crucial to have experienced legal counsel to make sure you are doing this right.

Good luck!

Leonard M. Weiner, Esq./Divorce Solutions