Divorce Solutions


My husband and I have been married for four years. We have a two-year-old son. He is military, and I was until our child was born. We both agreed for me to get out of the service to take care of the child and go back to college. Everything we own is in his name even though we bought it after marriage. He has not been a very good husband, and I am tired of being miserable. I want out after two years of trying to work it out. I have no job, no car, and no income. He has agreed to let me keep the car, and he will pay for it. We lived in TX, and I decided to move back to VA with my family. I want him to be able to have a good relationship with our son, but it seems almost impossible. I don’t want this to be ugly, and I still want to be on good terms with him. I don’t have the money to fight him in court over the property. How much support is he required to give me until the divorce is final? The only bills we have are house, car insurance, etc. There are no credit cards or lines of credit. He has almost $1000 left over a month after all bills are paid. He says that if I decided for sure to divorce, then I am cut off to any financial support besides child support, and he is just paying the car payment. He wants to keep the house, and I do not contest that even though there is over $10,000 in equity in it. How can I do this peacefully? I can not afford daycare so that I can go to school. I will get my GI. Bill in Oct., but that is not helping me now. Jobs in my area (southwestern VA) are scarce, and most people want full time and will not hire for a few weeks only. I would appreciate it if you can help any at all.

I cannot tell which state has jurisdiction over your case, but in an “Equitable Distribution” state ‘ or a “Community Property” state you would be entitled to approximately half of all marital assets (i.e. all assets acquired during the marriage with funds earned during the marriage regardless of in whose name the assets are registered). Also, since you are not working, your husband would have to provide you with some form of spousal support and even child care to allow you to go back to school to learn a profession or time to find a job that would enable you to be self-supporting. Do not be so quick to give up your right to half the equity in the house. It may be one of the few assets you have, and if you are not thinking of yourself, think of your child.

Discuss these matters with your husband and see if he would agree to mediate the issues with an experienced attorney-mediator in your area.

The alternative is costly litigation. If he refuses, you should contact an experienced matrimonial attorney in your area to discuss the matter further. If you do not have funds to pay for the lawyer, the court will make your husband pay for your lawyer also.