Divorce Solutions

Question #229

I live in NY. I have been married for 38 years. My husband left the marital home, claiming that it would be for a while to get a business out of state up and running. He advised me that the company purchased a house in Maryland for him to live and for the workers for the construction of business, etc. It was also to our advantage for him to become a resident of Maryland as my son was in college, and it provided in-state tuition status. Always being told the business was having difficultly with start-up, and it did not appear that the move back was soon. He then sold the house, which later I discovered was just owned by him, and relocated to Virginia as it was too much for him to commute to Washington, DC. During this time, he would come back to NY for all holidays, some weekends, etc. He then sold the one place in VA and moved to another. Later he claimed again the expenses were too much to carry, and he was going to share with a male friend an apartment in DC. He had the accountant who took care of our taxes, who also is an accountant for business had us file separately. I was on the payroll at that time at the DC store. He said the reasoning was to build my social security. I trusted and brought into the whole storyline as my life was complicated by having fragile health issues, a dying parent, house fire, and then being in charge of my mom’s estate took three years out of my life. He had always provided me with the profits out of one of the stores. Upon receiving a check, I found an address embedded into the check, one that I did not recognize. After researching, I found it was listed in his name and another woman. More searching found he owned two other homes and one attached to her name as well and a child that he fathered. He removed me from the payrolls and started providing directly for my support. It has been four years since all of this came to light. Our marital home he has promised that he would turn over to me…and of course, I am always put at bay. He is a principal in a business with others. I have no clue where I stand to pursue a divorce. There is no legal separation agreement; only an oral contract of what he will provide financially. As of now, both of our healths are not the best, and he claims he has nothing anymore.
I am becoming very concerned that he has converted a large amount of our funds to property, etc. in her name or the child’s name. She has relocated from the VA to FL within the last year. He claims he lives with a friend in DC, is in the process of selling a home in VA, he claims the status of living in FL for tax purposes and present deed is showing his mailing address for FL. Where do I stand legally? My son recently has offered for me to stay in an apt. He owns in NYC. I think it would be advantageous for me to make this move for health reasons, as well as the courts, are more liberal than where I live if filing for divorce is the solution. I worry about my health insurance, as well as maintaining the house. It was always our wish that the home went to the boys upon our demise. We wanted the boys to spend much time with me there on weekends- it has always been their home. Your thoughts on what would be in my best interests?

You should contact him and tell him you want a formal divorce and a full accounting of all of his finances, including income, expenses, and assets, and a formal Separation Agreement spelling out exactly his legal support obligations. If he refuses, tell him you intend to file for divorce in NY and that he will be forced to provide that info to the Court.

I strongly suggest you consider mediating your divorce, and if you live in the NYC metro area, please call me at 212-370-1660 to arrange for an appointment to discuss the matter in greater length.

Leonard Weiner, Esq.
Divorce Solutions