LEONARD M.WEINER, ESQ, Ph.D.

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LEONARD M.WEINER, ESQ, Ph.D.

(212) 370-1660

Divorce Solutions

Divorce Solutions

(212) 370-1660

(212) 370-1669

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Daily Question & Answer

Question #129

I live in a suburb of NYC. I have been married for five years and have one child (1 year). I am utterly miserable in my marriage. My husband and I do not love or even like each other; however, I know I do not have legal grounds for divorce iN.YNY. When I bring up the topic of divorce/separation, he tells me to leave but to leave our son with him. He says he would never separate without full custody of our son. I would be willing to share custody (if I was the primary custodial parent). I would not even want spousal support-just child support. My question(s) is/are am I stuck in this marriage due to lack of legal grounds and refusal of my husband AND if divorce is possible, could he get custody of my son? I am currently a part-time NYC school teacher. I stopped working full time when my son was born. I could go back full time whenever I want; however, even if I worked full time, he earns more than double what I do-would this impact custody? Also, I would have to reside with my parents (more than enough room for my son and me) for about a year to get on my feet. My husband could afford to live on his own. My question(s) is am I stuck in this marriage due to lack of legal grounds and refusal of my husband AND if divorce is possible, could he get custody of my son?

How are you so sure that you do not have grounds? If you are so miserable in your marriage, there must be something that your spouse has done to make you unhappy, and that may be sufficient grounds for you to file for divorce. In any case, it takes two to maintain a marriage. If you are so unhappy and want so desperately to get out of the marriage, I cannot believe that your spouse will remain despite your antagonistic feelings. You can make life miserable for him if he insists on keeping you in this marriage.

The fact that he makes more money than you is not sufficient for him to be awarded sole custody of the child, especially since the child is an infant, the courts generally will award resident custody to the mother.

You will also be entitled to spousal support to allow you to get on your feet and also attorney’s fees from him, and you can negotiate with that.

I suggest you speak to him directly in a moment of calm and explain that the marriage is not working. Explain to him that the divorce will take place with or without his consent, and he will ultimately be forced to pay for your attorney as well as his if he insists on litigating the matter.

Consider mediating this divorce instead of litigating it, and if you are living in the New York City metropolitan area, please call me at 212-370-1660 to discuss arranging for a meeting for the three of us to meet and discuss the matter.

Leonard M. Weiner, Esq./Divorce Solutions

Other Questions

Me and my husband have been married only a year. We are talking divorce. We have a nine month old son. Everything we have is in his name. He never would put my name on anything after I asked him to. Do i have to leave with my son and find a new home or am I allowed to stay here and raise my son?

  • June 18, 2019
  • Q&A

I have only been married for two years. I have two children and he has two and we all live Together in my husband’s house that he shared with his previous wife. We are having major issues and I don’t know what to do. We live out in the country around his family. All my family live out of state so I don’t really have a place to go. I left the house this weekend because my husband and I got into a heated argument and he had disabled the van I had been driving so I couldn’t go anywhere. I called the police and they came out to the house but by that time he fixed the van. Both of our young kids were crying, it was awful. He told me that I couldn’t come back to the house. My belonging are there. Does he have the right to change the locks on me? Can I call the police again before I go back? We have been staying in a hotel but money is running low. What are my rights as his wife although my name isn’t on his house. Can he just put my kids and me out?

  • June 18, 2019
  • Q&A

I live in Long Island and have been married for 20 years. My marriage hasn’t been easy through the whole marriage. I have two children who lives with us, one is underage and the other one is 19. I have questions in how to start this process. I can say that I’m nervous about it because I might be left with nothing. He has kicked me out of the house every time we argue but many of my friends tell me he can’t do that. He makes good money, the house is under his name, and he pays the mortgage. He has mentioned that the house is under the kids, including my step son. I am on Social Security Disability for about 5 months. Can he throw me out of the house? Will my younger child receive any money? He said I will not see a penny, meaning no alimony. I just want to leave this house and find an apartment for my kids and I but I don’t have the money for it. If he sells the house, will I get anything. I have no money saved because he has told me I have to pay the gas, light, car insurance and the phone bill which hardly leaves me with anything. What are my rights? How can I start in finding out in starting a divorce process. I am afraid because he has told me i will not receive a penny from him. Please tell me what can I do?

  • June 18, 2019
  • Q&A